Month: July 2020

Scan to Notice Emotions

My default is to suppress and minimize my own emotions. They may get in the way of my reasoning. I don’t want to seem unreasonable.

But in reality skirting our emotions can be the thing that makes us unreasonable. Our emotions are there for a reason. They are there as attention magnets, to help us notice things. To point out where we might need to focus.

We do need to ensure to manage our emotions but we cannot get used to suppressing them.

Emotion assists with reasoning.

At times we may find it easy to notice and actualize our emotions. Put words or images to our emotions and know what to do with them.

Other times we may miss them entirely. If you sense there is emotion present but you cannot recall it to the front of your head, try to simply scan your body.

Scan your body inside and out. Take note what is there. Wonder what the emotion behind that noticing is.

Allow emotion to assist in your reasoning process.

This idea is new to me. I learned it from Ed Batista’s Post on Antonio Damasio on Emotion and Reason.

Enrollment vs. Attention

Our typical meeting model or conversation model is all surrounding attention.

Now that everyone is in the same room, let me talk at you. Now that you’re done talking, let me tel you a story.

I’ve been forced to refine how I connect with people with increased digital connection. We cannot guarantee we have anyone attention (well we never have been able to but even more evident now).

This requires attaining enrollment.

The other person or people choosing to listen and engage. This type of engagement gains much more success and effectiveness than simply having someone’s attention.

Now that I have you together, I’m going to compel you to hear me out. Now that you’re done sharing, I will ask a question to dive deeper. Now that we are connected, I’m going to add something that you add valuable.

The focus of the interaction is less about us getting our way and more about us creating a space for the other to engage in a way that honors them. It’s service oriented. It’s other focused. It’s empathetic.

Take the chance in front of you to not just someone’s attention but enroll them.

Seek enrollment and gain awareness when you’re only seeking attention.

Enhance to Improve

The things I enjoy most are the ones I feel confident in. Not necessarily confident that I will do it well but confident that it is true, good, and at times that I will do well.

This confidence comes from preparation, certainty of expectations, practice.

Today I taught a scientific technical course which I have no hands on experience in yet is a very hands on concept. Even though I have no physical experience, I have thorough notes on the training. I’ve watched someone else give the training twice and taken notes of what they said, when, and to what context.

This enhancement led to confidence. Confidence led to improvement.

Enhancement for this was me taking notes on the training. Improving my preparation.

What else can I enhance to lead to higher confidence leading to more satisfaction and enjoyment. Even though I don’t particularly like something, doesn’t mean I can’t have confidence in it.

Maybe sometimes confidence can turn our “need” mindset into a “want” mindset.