I saw this on a sign of a restaurant. In the current COVID-19 crisis, businesses are barely staying afloat. The plead is common around.

There is one alternative to the pleading victim:

The Persecutor: I know better. I’m superior. Opening before suggestions. Choosing to follow instinct rather than wisdom or guidance.

When a company persecutes, it creates victims. When a company acts as a victim it invites rescuers.

Rescuers sound nice and all but are they really “helping?”

When we act as rescuers, we perpetuate the creation of victims.

The alternative I opt for is the confident, humble Contributor.

I’ve seen several businesses act as Contributors in this. Their statements are, “We are in this with you!”

They look for ways to lead and add value in the midst of it all. They recognize the struggle and yet face it with clarity of what they have to offer.

Of course this goes beyond businesses. If we ourselves don’t have clarity of who we are, how we contribute, we will find ourselves condemning as the Persecutor, pleading and hopeless as the Victim, or blindly Rescuing others without truly helping them.

Dig into who you are. Clarify yourself. Build rhythms and relationships that expand that true self. Grow and learn beyond where you are.

The Drama Triangle is the Rescuer, Victim, Persecutor image. I heard of it through Michael Bungay Stanier’s Coaching Habit